


marble soda

by ElopeToTheSea



Category: Kingdom Hearts
Genre: AkuRoku Day, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Finger guns, M/M, Summer
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-13
Updated: 2019-08-13
Packaged: 2020-08-20 22:28:08
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,050
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20235391
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ElopeToTheSea/pseuds/ElopeToTheSea
Summary: Sometimes, Roxas wonders if he feels anything at all. If he's even human. After all, humans feel something. They care about others. And him? He had long lost that.





	marble soda

Solitude is an all too familiar word for Roxas.

Sometimes, he wished he could remember a time when things felt real. A time when the food didn’t taste like ash in his tongue, or when the heat of the sun-warmed up his skin. Some magical, nonexistent time, when he could hear something other than the piano blasting through his earphones. These days around, it was the only thing he could bring himself to do. Taking them off would mean hearing shouts on the other side of the door, both at himself and at the other.

It was a hassle. He had long lost the ability to listen to them. Now, he could only hear. See their mouths moving, wondering why they even bothered to yell anymore.

Maybe it was after the third or fourth hit that he got too tired to deal with it longer than he had to. So, instead of going back to his room, he went outside. The night swallowed him, guiding him through the streets until he reached a convenience store. He stayed there for a couple of hours, just listening to a familiar piano playing on repeat. Only did he return when his phone had finally died.

Interestingly enough, his parents weren’t awake when he returned. The house was quiet, tranquil even.

It was pleasant.

Almost at peace.

That’s how Roxas found himself hanging out in old, almost abandoned, convenience stores across the city.

Every day, after school, he would take the detour and walk as far away as his legs took him. He found, that even on days he was tired, he could walk until he was on the edge of the city. So far away from the shouts and the bruises that he could take his earphones off and not hear the echoes.

Perhaps, those were the moments he looked forward in the day. Sitting outside of the conscience store, listening to music and eating junk food until the world went dark.

The only truly bad days where when it was raining.

Those days, he’d have to walk drenched. The blue hoodie he carried got soaked and his backpack was so wet it dripped.

It was a day when it was raining particularly hard that the cashier spoke to him.

“You shouldn’t hang outside when it’s like this,” she said with a worried look on her face.

“Can’t go elsewhere,” he answered simply, shoving his paid snacks into the bag.

The nervous look she shot him was enough for him to know she wouldn’t be dropping the topic.

“But you’ll get sick…” she said, biting her index finger, and looking between him and the window.

Roxas wanted to understand why she was so troubled. It wasn’t a big deal if he got sick or not. Bothersome, perhaps. His bones aching and sneezing all the time wasn’t fun. But a couple of days of medicine would fix it.

If he even got sick, that’s it.

“You’re in high school, right?” she asked. Roxas nodded. “How about you go to the Radiant campus? Tell them you’re waiting for your sister or something. I’m sure they’ll let you in with this weather.”

That’s how Roxas found himself sitting in the cafeteria of the campus, staring through the window, at the rain that fell like a torrent. His phone buzzed, and he turned up the sound of the piano up. He didn’t want to deal with her.

Finishing the last bag of chips he had, he reached for his bag where the last bits of food was. He hated this moment the most. It was a close reminder that it was about time to go. With nothing more to chew on, his vision getting blurry, and the sky turning darker, time was running low. Eventually, he’d have to go home.

He took the bottle out and set it on the table trying to make the moment last longer than it had. Dragging out every second, engraving the vision of water-stained glass in front of him, so he could pretend he didn’t have a place where to go back to.

“That’s it, I can’t keep watching,” he heard a distant voice say. “Hey, kid.”

Roxas turned around.

_Red_.

“Are you insane? You can’t go around with a soaked hoodie,” the guy in red hair said.

It would be a lie to say the water didn’t bother Roxas. It was cold, it stuck to his skin, and it was starting to smell too humid for him to be comfortable. But it was just that.

Bothersome.

So, he shrugged.

“How are you even alive?” the boy asked with a sigh. Roxas shrugged again. “Take that thing off.”

Sending the taller guy a puzzled look, Roxas finally looked up. He was surprised to find boy taking off his own zip-up hoodie.

“What are you doing?”

“Wow, so you can _actually_ talk,” the boy said with a chuckle. “You’re gonna catch a cold, buddy. Just take the damn jacket.”

Against his better judgment, Roxas did as he was told. He peeled off the grey hoodie, leaving him only in the black thin shirt he had picked up in the morning before leaving for school. The boy tossed him the jacket.

“Now leave before it gets late,” the boy said.

“Can’t,” Roxas replied, putting on the jacket. It was far more comfortable than his own. The only thing he found he didn’t like, was that it was about three or four sizes too big on him. “Haven’t finished.”

The boy’s gaze quickly fell to his soda.

“You _have_ to be kidding.”

To prove that he wasn’t, he quickly hit the cap, making the marble fall down. He took a sip.

“Jesus.” Roxas heard the boy give a long sigh. “That’s it. I’m leaving. Don’t get kidnapped.”

“Wait,” Roxas said. “What about your jacket-?”

“Nah, I didn’t like that old thing either way,” the boy in red hair replied. “Keep it.”

Roxas was then left alone again. It didn’t bother him. It never had. He was used to it. Used to eating alone and being forgotten. Having his face disappear from everyone memories the moment they passed by. He was used to being ignored; of being a shadow that everyone preferred not to think about.

So, it didn’t bother him that the guy had left him alone. Again.

He sipped on the marble soda again, tasting the bitterness of his solitude along with the reminder of being back. Sometimes, he had heard the girl that sat by his side say that marble soda tasted sweet. He wondered if what she said was true.

* * *

Axel was tired after his morning classes. He was dead beat and wanting nothing more than go home and take a nap. But just as it was his luck, he forgot his keys in a rush to get to his seven am class. Luckily, his roommate was kind enough to let him borrow her. The only problem was that she was working across the campus.

“The hell Xion?” he asked as soon as he stepped inside of the convenience store. “Isn’t there supposed to be AC inside these things?”

Xion, bless her heart, simply smiled despite the complete inferno that was boiling inside the little store.

“It broke down with the thunderstorm,” she explained, taking out the keys from her pocket. “Wish they’d fix it already…”

Axel winced. The thunderstorm had been a few days ago, which meant she had been without AC for a while now. Regardless, he took the keys, stopping for a second to admire the, _frankly ugly_, little charm attached to it. He would never know why Xion liked those little monsters -_DreamEaters-_ that kept appearing on tv.

“Sucks to be you,” he said, putting the keys inside his bag. Xion let out a sigh in agreement. “Hey, mind if I steal something to drink? This heat is insane!”

“Sure thing,” she absent-mindedly called from the back of the store.

Axel reached for the coolers and wondered if he should pick some ice cream. It sounded about right with the sudden heatwave that hit. But just as he reached to take them, he spotted something familiar in the racks.

Without thinking, he reached to take it out and went with Xion to pay. At the sight, the girl raised an eyebrow.

“Since when do you like this?” she asked, scanning the bar code.

“Since I’m too weak to resist a cold fizzy drink,” he replied, opening it up.

He took a gulp of it, grimacing a bit at the flavor. It was _sweet_. Too sweet maybe. But it helped wonders with how much he was sweating. Cold and refreshing, quickly cooling him down from the sprint he had made to catch Xion before her shift was over.

The chiming of bells came through the door to which Xion quickly chirped ‘welcome!’ as if she were being paid more than minimum wage to do this. That was one thing that Axel honestly admired of her: the ability to smile even when the world seemed to be crashing down.

He took another gulp of soda, growing used to the sweet taste the more he drank.

“Man, I was so worried about him,” Xion said from behind the counter. “I’m glad he doesn’t seem to have a cold…”

Axel turned around to see who Xion was talking about when the sound of cans being dropped against the tiles echoed inside of the store. Familiar blue eyes were staring back, but the expression inside them was different.

What a small word.

“That was the last one,” the boy said, voice low.

Axel turned his head to where the boy was looking at.

His soda.

“Oh,” he managed to say.

The boy had been very insistent that he first had to finish his soda before going back, right? Axel couldn’t really understand why.

“Just pick another, dude,” Axel said with a shrug.

“I’m leaving,” the boy said instead, not even bothering to pick the two cans of coke from the tiles.

“Wait!” Xion called quickly. “Let me check if there’s some in the back!”

Axel raised an eyebrow at Xion. Yeah, his roommate was known for being excessively kind, but not to this extent. Was she really worried about the kid? Well, in her defense, the boy did seem to have little to no self-preservation instincts. It ought to kick her maternal instincts.

Xion went to the back as quickly as she had said, while the boy stayed on the front door. Axel tried not to steal too many glances at the boy, but it was quite hard. In broad daylight, he looked even smaller than he had in the darkness of the cafeteria evening. Dead eyes that couldn’t hold a gaze, even if they tried.

It made even Axel’s heart tug.

“You really like this?” Axel asked, raising the soda up.

The boy nodded, ever so slowly but his furrowed eyebrows sent mixed messages.

“I’ll trade you, then,” Axel said, reaching for the freezer right next to the counter. He tossed one of the popsicles inside, towards the boy. “Here.”

The boy held the blue popsicle in his hands. With slow movements, he managed to open the wrapper.

“Sorry, I couldn’t find any-”

She came out of the back to see the boy licking the popsicle. The way his eyes widened and a small smile tugged his lips was enough to make Xion tear up.

“It’s good,” he said.

“Am I forgiven?” Axel asked with a grin on his face.

The boy looked up. Axel wished he could know what the expression meant, but it remained blank. He nodded slowly, though, and he counted that as a win. With that, the boy went to the chips section.

After he was out of sight, Xion spoke.

“He’s still in high school,” she was quick to say.

“If he’s eighteen it’s legal,” Axel laughed, which earned him a smack from the five feet tall girl.

“Not him, okay?” Xion begged. “He’s…not okay. I can sense it. I don’t want you to hurt him more than he’s already.”

“Relax, Xion,” Axel said. “You have to be blind not to see the guy has issues. Even _I_ am not heartless enough to hurt him.”

“Thanks,” she replied with a relieved sigh.

Just as they finished talking, the boy came up to the counter with a massive amount of junk food. Axel raised an eyebrow.

“Hey, kid you’re gonna ruin your appetite for dinner with all this,” Axel said, missing completely the way Xion was trying to tell him to cut it.

“This is dinner,” the boy replied, shoving the food into his bag.

He paid and left. Xion sighed.

“I promised Namine I’d drop by her house,” Xion said picking up her bag from the ground. “See you home?”

“Sure, sure,” he said, watching as the boy walked out of the store, just to sit down outside. “Hey, ring me up another ice cream.”

Xion sighed.

A few minutes later, he was sitting next to the boy in the parking lot of the convenience store.

“Mind I fi join you?” he asked. The boy shrugged. “I’m Axel, by the way. You?”

“Roxas,” he replied without much enthusiasm.

Axel opened up the wrapped of his popsicle and began eating. Roxas didn’t say much more after that. Instead, he simply stared at the passing by cars with an earbud in. There wasn’t much for Axel to say or do, so they sat in comfortable silence until the sunset, when Xion was asking where he was since he had her keys.

He did try to say goodbye to Roxas, but the guy was so absorbed at the moment that he barely noticed Axel leaving. With a low chuckle, Axel stared at Roxas. He couldn’t deny he was cute.

It became routinely for Axel to sit next to Roxas in the old parking lot. Slowly, the boy began to open up. First, there were bits, like the fact that Roxas preferred the normal kind of marble soda than the peach one. Or that he liked to listen to the piano -to which Axel promptly showed him all new kinds of songs because one can’t live entirely off piano music-.

And little by little, Axel managed to see glimpses of a smile in Roxas's lips. He seemed livelier, answering with sarcasm sometimes or laughing at a very bad joke Axel would say.

“Why do you leave marble soda for last?” he asked once.

“It’s my favorite,” he answered, taking a sip from it. The twilight was already on the horizon, almost time for both to go home.

“Don’t you think it’s too sweet?” Axel asked, grimacing at the memory.

“It’s bitter,” Roxas replied. “It used to be sweeter.”

“Sweeter?! Wouldn’t you get cavities from something like that…”

“I didn’t,” Roxas said, his mind wandering with his words. “Neither did Sora…”

“Sora?” Axel asked. “Who’s that?”

Instead of answering, Roxas began drinking the soda as if to keep himself entertained. His eyes were hazed over, probably remembering something. His lips tightened.

The bottle was empty. Roxas played with the blue cap on top.

“He was a friend,” he finally said. “We used to get it out and play with it during summer vacation.”

“The marble?” Axel asked. Roxas nod was almost invisible. “Why not just play with your own, man? Seems like a bother.”

Roxas let out a chuckle, and Axel stared. He had never heard Roxas chuckle like that. It was soft, full of happiness and mischief. In a split of a second, Roxas seemed like a little devil; cute but dangerous. The emphasis in cute.

“It was fun,” he reminisced. A sad smile spread through. “We would spend days trying to get it out and play with them until Sora lost his…”

His smile fell, eyes going dark as his memories continued.

“…that’s when it last tasted sweet.”

Axel was unsure of what to say at that moment. He had grown used to an unresponsive Roxas, who would sometimes just stare off to the distance. A Roxas that was sad? He wasn’t sure how to cheer him up…And the sight was heartbreaking. The already small and fragile guy, with a look of utter loss in his eyes…It was cruel to just let him stay like that.

“Maybe you took too much sweet,” he offered. At that, Roxas looked up. “Sometimes, when you eat too many sweets, you get used to it and stop tasting it.”

“Or maybe…” Axel continued. “The sweet thing wasn’t the soda.”

Roxas stayed silent for a second. Thinking, perhaps, as the twilight continued on.

“Is there still sea salt ice cream?” Roxas asked, setting aside the soda. 

Axel grinned.

“I’ll go check.”

* * *

It was a late September morning when Roxas realized. He had gotten up from bed, put on his checkered shirt and jeans when he shivered.

It was cold. He was cold.

The knowledge sat uncomfortably in his chest, trying to understand what it was. It was strange to feel his hair stand up and want some kind of warmth to make up for it.

He had tried to reach for his hoodie when his fingers twitched.

Right next to it, was Axel’s old zip-up hoodie. It was larger and looked way puffier than his. Warmer. His cheeks heated up when his mind went to the day before when Axel had slipped and said he was cute.

“I’m not cute,” he said to himself, grabbing the jacket.

It was definitely warmer than his hoodie. If he breathed in, he could smell the faint, almost distant, the scent of Axel’s cologne. It did funny things to his nose that made him giggle. The feeling was almost like a giant hug from a giant person, enveloping him in safety. Unconsciously, he rubbed his face on the sleeves, enjoying the feel of the soft material against his skin, and the smell in his nose.

It was almost a cheer-me-up charm. If for only a moment, Roxas was sure he felt a bit more ready to go out. He picked his bag and rushed out of the door.

* * *

Axel was fucked.

He could definitely hear Xion snickering from the counter as she scanned the bar code for the pair of sea salt ice cream.

“I didn’t know you lent him your jacket,” Xion said with a grin.

Axel shoved the money to the girl and stepped out of the convenience store.

“Isn’t it cold for ice cream?” Roxas asked, taking the popsicle from his hand.

“I don’t see you complaining,” Axel replied.

“I never complain about free food,” Roxas said, licking the popsicle without a second thought.

Roxas was wearing his hoodie. Axel couldn’t compute. His eyes drifted up and down, trying to understand what was happening inside his chest that made it beat so much. If Roxas had seemed small before, it didn’t compare when he was wearing Axel’s jacket. The boy was drowning in black fabric, nuzzling the sleeves whenever he thought Axel was looking away.

“I never did return it…” Roxas said, looking at the jacket. “Should I give it back?”

_Never, please God, keep it and wear it forever. _

“Nah, it was a size too small for me either way,” he said.

“Oh,” Roxas said, his cheeks turning scarlet. “Then I guess I’ll keep stealing it.”

Axel was lightheaded from the sight. Roxas with his cheeks colored red was the most adorable thing he had ever seen. It took every ounce of will power not to pinch them and tease him further.

The only reason why he didn’t, was because Roxas's hand was quietly placed above his after that. And moving it simply seemed like the worst idea ever.

So Axel shut his mouth and enjoyed the feeling of Roxas’ head falling to his shoulder where it would stay until it was time to go home.

* * *

The bad thing about feeling again was that spending time with Axel was beginning to feel like a nightmare. His cheeks got red, his pulse quickened, and the need to scream got so overpowering he had to run home just to alleviate all the energy inside.

And by consequence, for the first time in months, he got home in time.

Which meant, his parents were there.

Roxas had completely forgotten what listening to them even was. Listening to them fight and listening to them scream all those awful things. Even worse, now that he could feel what they were trying to say, they didn’t slide off his mind and heart as easily.

They cut.

“This is just like when you were hanging out with that Sora kid,” his mother said, exasperated as she paced around the house. “Running off to god knows where doing criminal acts!”

I didn’t do that with Sora, he wanted to say. But it was useless. They didn’t listen

They never did.

“You’re such a useless son,” she continued rambling. “Why couldn’t I get a child that was good in class? Why someone who didn’t go out to hang out with smokers? Why couldn’t I get a well-behaved kid?”

Roxas clenched his fists.

“This is why your little Sora friend left you,” she said. Roxas froze. “He would never want to hang out with someone like you.”

By the time he had come back to his senses, he was outside in the convenience store not too far away from home. He had his phone in hand, texting the single number he had saved.

[hey, axel wanna come hang out?]

[send me your location]

“Here,” Axel said when he was there.

Roxas looked up from the ground, his eyes puffy and red. He had been crying all night. He had forgotten what it felt like to do that.

Axel was offering him a blue bottle. One that Roxas was all too familiar with.

“Thanks,” he said.

They popped the cap, letting the marble fall in. Roxas didn’t feel like drinking yet.

“Do you think you need a heart to be alive?” Roxas asked all of the sudden.

“Depends on what you mean by alive,” Axel said, looking up to the stars in the sky. He took a gulp from the soda. “I mean, without emotions, we could still be like physically alive…But then what fun would that make?”

“But then you wouldn’t have to cry,” Roxas replied, staring at the sparkles of the soda’s bubbles against the crystal. “We wouldn’t need to be sad.”

“Would that be fun, though?” Axel asked. “No crying at the movies? No melancholy when you meet your friend again? No feeling like you could have done better…? Not to mention all the fun stuff you would miss.”

“Like what?” Roxas asked.

“Being happy, falling in love…” Axel said.

“Overrated,” Roxas huffed out. Axel laughed. A low, deep laugh that made Roxas’ heart stutter from how good it sounded.

“You’re just a killjoy,” he said.

Despite himself, Roxas laughed. He took a small sip from the marble soda.

It was fizzy and cold, sweet in his tongue as the tears from his eyes fell down.

“By the way, look what I brought,” Axel said, showing off his keys.

“Your keychain?” Roxas asked.

A small screwdriver was attacked to it.

“Look,” he said.

After a bit of a struggle with the cap of the bottle, it came off.

“Give me your hand,” he said.

Roxas tried to stop his heart from stammering, as Axel’s hands – so much bigger than his. Wide and calloused, almost like they could hold him and keep them safe from harm – took his. From the bottle, the marble rolled out.

Roxas gasped. He raised it, so it would shine against the cheap lights of a seven eleven and reflected the moon.

“It’s so pretty…” Roxas breathed out, trying to catch the glimmers of marble. “Thanks…”

He barely registered, when exactly Axel put his arm around his shoulders, or when they got so close their legs touched. Not that Roxas minded. In fact, he found it was the opposite. He liked it.

Hopefully, they didn’t have to separate until morning came.

And, as he closed his eyes, burying his face in Axel’s shoulder, maybe Axel was right. Having a heart was worth it.

After all, without it, he wouldn’t know how sweet marble soda tasted.

**Author's Note:**

> i have no idea what i just did. 
> 
> i had read maybe three akuroku fics, when i started writing this, so im not entirely sure if the characterization is all that good. regardless, i had fun with this! I hope people will like this little gift for the ship day! After all, i think thie ships is very very sweet and cute!


End file.
